THE BEST JOKES OF PEPITO IN THE WORLD!
His mother asked, “Why the long face, son?
You look so worried!”
He replied, “I was just thinking,
Why do we celebrate Father’s Day?
It’s not like Mother’s Day,
Moms do so much more!”
His mother raised an eyebrow,
“Is that so?”
“Of course! You cook,
Help me with homework,
And are always there for me.
Dad just works and comes home to rest!”
The mother paused for a moment,
Then said, “I see why you think that,
But let me explain something, Pepito.
Even if Dad’s work isn’t visible,
It’s really important.
Look, your dad works long hours
So we have everything we need:
This house, food on the table,
Lights on, and even your favorite things,
Like your bike and video games!”
Pepito shrugged, “Yeah,
But isn’t that what he’s supposed to do?”
“True, it’s his responsibility,”
She replied, “But think about this:
Not everyone puts in the effort like your dad does.
He doesn’t just provide material things,
He teaches you values like respect,
Hard work, and honesty.
That’s priceless, son!
He’s shaping who you’ll become in the future.
I know sometimes it seems like
Mom does more because she’s home,
Taking care of so many details.
But a father’s effort, though silent,
Is another form of love.”
“Remember, Pepito,
A good father deserves not just celebration,
But recognition on Father’s Day.
Let’s celebrate those who,
With love, effort, and dedication,
Are the fundamental pillars in our families.
Their guidance and support inspire
Values, strength, and unity.
Thanks for everything you do every day!”
The Tale of the Three Women and the Chickens
When they arrived at the gates, they met Saint Peter.
He said, “Lately, we’ve only been getting scheming women up here!”
“Looking at your records, you ladies weren’t exactly saints.”
“So, I have a proposition for you. Follow me, please.”
“Well, here we are, let’s not dwell on the past; let’s move forward!”
“God help us, I hope Saint Peter doesn’t know my laundry list of sins!”
They followed Peter to a track full of chickens.
“Listen up, schemers! Your challenge is to cross to the other side without stepping on a single chicken.”
“If you do, you’ll be chained for eternity to the ugliest person who lands here!”
“Now, let’s begin!”
The women started walking, being super careful.
But suddenly, the first woman stepped on a chicken!
Saint Peter appeared, “Well lady, you stepped on a chicken, so now you’ll be chained to this guy.”
He chained her to a man so ugly, he’d get second place in an ugly contest!
Next, the second woman was super careful until she got distracted, gazing at the sky.
Then, a chicken popped up, and Saint Peter said, “Oh no! Now you’re chained to this guy for being careless!”
He chained her to a man who looked like a horse!
“Oh please, not like this!”
Finally, the third woman walked carefully, not a chicken in sight.
Saint Peter appeared and chained her to a tall, handsome man with the looks of a soap opera star!
“Wow, you must be my prize because I didn’t step on any chickens!”
The man replied, “I don’t know what you’re talking about, lady.
I just walked, stepped on a chicken, and now I’m stuck with the ugliest woman here!”
The Best One-Liner Jokes
“Oh, Mrs. Carmen, how are you doing?”
“Those hearing aids you gave me are fantastic!
I can hear perfectly now!”
“And how’s the family?”
“Well, I haven’t told them yet,
But I’ve changed my will four times already,
Those ungrateful rascals!”
The Best Jokes of the Month
He says to the waiter, “Hey, I’ve got a deal for you!
Here’s 10,000 pesos: if I can sniff a spoon and guess what you cooked today,
I eat for free; if not, the money’s yours!”
The waiter, a bit confused, thinks, “Why not?”
He goes to the kitchen and grabs a dirty spoon.
He hands it to the guy, who sniffs it and confidently declares,
“Today, you made rice, chicken, green beans, and a bit of onion!”
The waiter is amazed, the guy eats for free, and this happens for days.
Until one day, the waiter, annoyed, tells the waitress,
“Hey, I need you to do something for me…
Rub this spoon on your… you know!”
“What?!” she exclaims.
“Just trust me, he’ll never guess!”
She complies, hands it to the guy, and he sniffs it and says,
“Oh wait, I didn’t know Maria worked here!”
The Best Jokes of the Month
I have something important to tell you…
It’s a secret I’ve been hiding.
Oh really, daughter? Tell me!
Well, Dad…
I work in a “friendly” club.
I’m kind of a PR lady, you know?
What a scandalous thing to do!
You know we’re a religious family!
I don’t want to see you again in my life!
I know, Dad…
I just wanted to say I bought you that 4×4 truck you’ve always wanted…
And a house in Miami, right by the beach!
Plus, $300,000 cash to spend however you want!
Wait, daughter, what did you say you were?
I’m a “friendly” lady, Dad!
Oh, a “friendly” lady!
I thought you said a “protester.”
That’s fine, my dear!
As long as it’s honest money!
When can you come visit us?
THE BEST JOKES IN THE WORLD!
“Hey honey, guess what?
My boss asked me to join him for a fishing trip,
and some really important clients will be there!”
“Okay, love. How long will you be gone?”
“We’re leaving for a week.”
“Ah, darling, could you do me a favor?
Please pack enough clothes for a whole week.”
“Sure, and don’t forget my fishing rod,
and the bag with the hooks,
and please include my silk blue pajamas.”
The wife pauses for a moment,
“Honey, are you there?”
“Yes, dear, I’ll get to it right away!”
A week later, the husband returns,
“Honey, I’m back! How was it?”
“Pretty great! We caught so many fish,
we didn’t leave even a single one as a sample!”
“But why didn’t you pack my blue pajamas like I asked?”
“I did, love! I checked thoroughly,
and they weren’t there.”
“You would have found them if you had opened
the fishing box!”
The Best Jokes of the Month
Minutes after arriving, the baby gave a shorn,
“Listen up, folks, I’m here to say,
I’ll only be around for three days, okay?”
“My mom in six will close her eyes,
And dad in fifteen—oh what a surprise!”
[Music playing softly]
And as the baby said, so it came to be,
In three days, he went, as quick as a bee.
Mom followed at six—what a fright,
Dad, scared now, sold all their stuff that night!
“No more plates, no more chairs, I must run away,
Because my deadline’s approaching, come what may!”
On the fifteenth day, dad braced for the blow,
But guess what? His neighbor just said, “Hey, bro!”
In life, never rush, take your time, my friend,
Sometimes laughter is how we can mend!
The Best Jokes of Pepito in the World!
at her boyfriend’s parents’ house for the first time.
As they sat down to enjoy a delicious meal,
she felt a little discomfort from the broccoli
and her nerves started to kick in.
In need of relief, she let out a tiny fart,
it wasn’t loud but everyone heard it.
Before she could feel embarrassed,
her boyfriend’s dad looked at the sleeping dog
at her feet and said, “Was that you or the dog?”
With a huge smile of relief on her face,
she thought, “Well, at least I’m not alone!”
A few minutes later, the pain returned,
this time she didn’t hesitate,
she let out a much stronger, longer toot.
The dad looked at the dog again and yelled,
“Damn it, Skippy!”
Once more, the woman smiled and thought,
“What a night!”
Just when she thought it was over,
she broke wind again,
this one rivaling the sound of a train whistle.
The father groaned and shouted,
“Skippy, get away from her
before she does more than just toot!”
The Most Viral Jokes of the Year
“Of course, but don’t hit me with one of your silly questions.”
“Where did humans come from?”
“From Adam and Eve, it’s written in the Bible.”
“But Dad says we evolved from monkeys!”
“Well, dear, one thing is your dad’s family, and another very different thing is mine!”
The Best Jokes of the Month
while single ones stay slim?
The women fell silent, and then one of them said,
“I’ll tell you why!
Single men come home at night,
open the fridge, find nothing they like,
and go to bed hungry.
Meanwhile, married men come home at night,
head to bed without seeing anything they fancy,
and go right to the fridge instead!”